Happy Halloween!!!

Leia turning her head.

She wasn't exactly the happiest baby when I started filming, it was feeding time. :)

Some progress?!?!

I think we have already made some progress (although, I'm sure tomorrow will be completely different.....). ;) Hope I didn't sound so... depressed yesterday.. :/ :) I'm more just worried about her.. :/

She has been asleep for the last hour.. and it wasn't too difficult to put her down.

When she woke up at 05.30 this morning, I decided to feed her and keep her up. She was having a typical daytime feeding: where she latches on and unlatches and keeps doing that over and over. She wants to look around too much.. :/ :) So, I fed her for her normal amount of time and then I decided to take her downstairs. I held her for a short while, and then put her in her baby gym, and she stayed there.. for.. a good amount of time! She probably would have stayed longer, but I took her upstairs to change her clothes because she spit-up and it went all the way down her back.. :/ :)

And then I fed her until she was done and just hanging on for fun - then I got in the rocking chair and rocked her (with her sucking on my finger, of course).. :/ :) And she fell asleep. So, I was able to shower and get a few things done. I don't mind pacifying her all day if she isn't interested in sleeping - I just want a few minutes in the morning to shower, brush my teeth, etc... :/ :))

So, I'm going to try to pick a couple times during the day when I know she might be getting tired, and try to have her regularly sleep during those times. Maybe she is ready for a routine/schedule already.. :/

But she fell asleep at her normal time last night.. at 19.20 and she slept very well through the night.

But the thing is is that she has been like this since she was born, it isn't something new, it has only gotten more defined.

And I appreciate the comments! And I received a very nice e-mail from my middle sister, Beverly, saying her oldest daughter had similar bouts of not wanting to sleep. I'm one to accept advice from others! I don't mind at all. Everyone experiences different things, and every now and then someone might have an idea that works. (And I'm good at ignoring stuff that I think is preachy.) ;) It isn't like I don't know all babies are different (goodness knows I've taken care of plenty), but I think there is a difference when the child is your own.. :/ And you are the "sole" decision maker.

Fredrik is afraid that it is a sign of her intelligence (her not interested in sleeping), that she is too smart for her own good.. :/ :) We are certain she can tell the difference btwn night and day now. And she has been rolling from her back to her side for the last couple of days.

Now I am going to try to rest a little until she decides to wake up. :)

She won't sleep.

During the day, Leia won't sleep.

This seems to be her pattern now. She is awake for 12 hours and then sleeps for 12 hours -- or something like that.

She was in her wake-cycle at about 6-6.30 this morning, and she has only slept about 2 hours today. And it isn't like I (we) haven't constantly tried to get her to sleep. She is always close to sleeping - but she fights it!! She will keep one eye open or as soon as I move a toe to lay her in her bed, she wakes up. And if you just lay her down anyways, within a few minutes she is crying.

And she constantly wants to eat during the day, or at least be connected to my breast.

But then like last night, she (finally) fell asleep at 7, and slept for 4 hours straight. She woke up for a 15 minute feeding, and slept for another 3 hours, and then for the rest of the night, she did pretty good with eating and sleeping until this morning.

But everynow and then the cycle shifts, and she'll sleep well for a day, and then fight sleeping 12 hours during the night, and then sleep all day, etc.. and then the cycle will shift again, etc.. etc..

So, I am pretty frustrated.. :/ Not being able to get her to sleep "properly" because what she is doing seems and feels so unnatural..
But I'm sure (and hoping) that other babies have had the same strange sleeping habits..

You would think that if she was SO exhausted, that she would just fall asleep.. :/ but she is so alert some times and even laid in her baby gym for a good while this afternoon very contented..

But it just makes me feel so horrible because I am certain she is tired.. :/ but there isn't much I can do if she won't close her eyes or if she doesn't stay asleep.. :/ But it still makes me feel like a horrible mother... :/ :(

Ugh... :/

Two more weeks.

So, two more weeks was the nurses' guess on how long I would have to have the tube.. :(

We got in right away and the two, old nurses cleaned it (rinsed it out) and tried to press more out, and rebandaged the area, commenting on how it couldn't be in a more impractical place (and I fully agree.......).

They spent half the time staring and poking at Leia, though... :/ :)

And yesterday, when letting the area drain, the doctor walked around to my other side and asked me to say "distriktssköterskasmottagningen" (the district nurse's office) in Swedish.. :/ :D He wanted to see how good my Swedish was, and he and the nurse were thoroughly impressed. ;)

Fredrik is still home - he decided to work the rest of the day from the house.
But we have another appointment on Thursday - but at least that is in the late afternoon, so it isn't as horrible a time for him to leave work.

And he remembered last night that at 11 today he had an appointment with a journalist that was going to come and take pictures of him for an article...... So, Fredrik had to call him this morning, and the journalist was luckily enough able to come earlier in the morning to take pictures of Fredde. So, I once again feel horrible for completely making him alter his plans and work schedule to come and drive me to the doctor... :/ But, hopefully by next week, I'll feel better enough with walking to maybe go by myself (well, Leia, too, of course).

And not only am I disturbing things, but lots of fun things are happening for Fredrik at work..... :/ :))
The boss for the sanitation project has moved on to another project, and someone new has shown up - and he isn't being very.. personable... He has a few weird demands for Fredrik that really isn't his job to do.. :/
And then... the project is supposed to take a break for December, which was great for our trip to the US.. But at the sight yesterday, they found solid quicksilver....... And had to stop and decide what to do about it ... So, that is going to push back the project, and someone happened to mention to Fredrik yesterday about working through December. So, that will make things interesting for the project.. :/ :) (with Fredrik being gone for a month, I mean). But that is their problem.. :/

But now Leia has woken up from her very, very short nap (only 30 min), so I have to go check on her... :P

I have ouchies.

So starting on.. Saturday.. or Sunday maybe it was.. :/ The abscess area actually turned into an abscess.. :/ The area was soft and puffy..

So, Fredrik called the hospital today and got me an appointment for this afternoon (it was at 15.40). I had the same doctor as before, and the snobbishness was gone this time and he was super friendly. And the nurses were great, too. (Fine if you have to visit a hospital (usually never a good reason when you visit a hospital), but it helps if the staff is personable.)

And they cut me open .. without being able to numb anything.. :( And it hurt.. A LOT. They drained what they could - and he said that they might would have to do it again, but that I might would need anesthetic.. :/ Because it is so deep. So, he put in a tube, to let it drain - which also hurt.. :/ But they were pleased after the tube was in, because it started draining much more. So, hopefully I won't need anything further.. We can keep our fingers crossed at least. :/

I have an appointment to go back tomorrow, at 11.30, for them to check it and clean it.. not sure if they are going to take the tube out or not.. or if that will be later.

But it hurts.. :/ Difficult to sit. :/

So, Fredrik has to come home tomorrow to take me to the doctor.... again...
So, I feel like a bit of a ... pain in the butt (literally and non-literally speaking).. He has plenty to do for work in the morning, and I feel like I'm always causing problems.. :/

But Leia and I did well today, alone, for the first time. :/ :) She fought to sleep all night.. she just won't close her eyes.. :/ :) Not much I can do about that.. :/ :) But she slept okay today, although she wasn't too happy when I woke her up to change her clothes when we had to leave for the doctor.. :)
And right now she is fighting pappa to go to sleep as well. She closes her eyes, but she just wants to be held.. :/ And we need to do things, and she needs to sleep in her bed.. :/ :) It works eventually, just takes patience. :)

Presents from Aunt Yamini!!

[I hope you don't mind us calling you Aunt Yamini! :) You are the closest I have to a sister or best friend in Sweden - so I thought it fitting to give you such a title. :)]

Last week we received some beautiful gifts from my friend, Yamini, and her husband, JP, and their 5 month old daughter, Vanya. Yamini was born and raised in California and her parents are from India (as well as JP), so Vanya has the best of 3 Worlds!! :)



A few little goodies.
A very soft, adorable sleeper.
And a beautiful horse mobile from India. It hangs straight up and down (vertically).

Thanks so much! :)
(And I promise I will call you soon!!)

Our sweethearts.

Don't think we've forgotten about our precious Mr. Kitties. :))



We make sure we both take some time each day to play with him and pet him. He is handling our new family member very well. :) The crying or noises don't bother him. And if it would happen to annoy him, he just slowly walks out of the room. :) He likes to sniff her and I think he licked her head once.. :/ :) (It was dark in the room when I was feeding her, so I'm not sure.) He sleeps on the rug in her room and often lays at my feet when we have our feeding times.




And a picture of Leia in her baby gym. :) I had fed her and she wasn't tired, and we were going to start dinner, so we put her in her gym to see if she would like it, and it kept her quiet for a long time (until she got a poopie diaper). She purposefully reached for the toys - not perfect motor skills, but a definite reaching for the toys.

Zombies.

Today, Fredrik and I are going to be a couple of zombies. :/ Neither of us got much sleep last night. Leia fought to sleep and only had one good stretch of sleep. Her eyes are closed and she seems asleep, but she moves her arms around a lot and crunches her body up, so we are thinking she is suffering from gas.. :/

But of this whole past week, there were only 2 bad nights, so I don't think we can complain too much. And yesterday, Leia had plenty of time where she was awake and alert and didn't complain - eventually she would complain about food or sleep, :) but she did pretty good yesterday. :) And her sleeping has been great, during the day and the night. So, we have to look past the few bad nights and keep our sights set on the positives..... :/ :)) (Although, when you're really tired, that can be difficult). :))) But I think that Fredrik might actually be joining me for a couple of naps today.. :))

I did get to see a doctor on Friday!
The calling hours were 9-10 and 2-3, and it was 11 when we actually had a chance to call, so Fredrik called the "emergency" number instead, and they accepted our situation - we were a little surprised about that. And they gave me an appointment at 13.20. The doctor was extremely snobbish, but nice enough, and he gave me some antibiotics. Unfortunately, they will give Leia diarrhea.. :/ Which could also be why she is a little ify right now about sleeping (but only during the night last night was it difficult for her). And we just have to keep an eye on it, if it gets to the point where it can be drained, and just go back and then have it drained. But he confirmed our fear, that it will probably be a lifetime problem for me now. :/

During Friday night/Saturday morning, the area started hurting some. :/ And it is uncomfortable and difficult to walk.. :/ So, we are hoping the antibiotics will do their magic and help out some.

Although I did get a super-nice back massage last night from Fredrik. :)

But we had a full day on Friday. We also went looking for new winter boots for Fredrik, and we tried to find some new glasses for both of us. Although, I am so blind, that when I try on new glasses, even if I put my face to the mirror, I can't see what I look like.. :/ So, I am going to have to solely go by how Fredrik says I look in each pair.. :/ And we picked up some pictures from a photographer in town.

Today Fredrik's plan is to change to winter tires.
My plan is to shower and nap. :))

Leia: 2 weeks old

We decided to "celebrate" Leia's 2-week birthday by giving her her first bath. :) She actually really enjoyed it!! We were expecting her to cry the whole time. :)






And yesterday we tried the baby-carrier for the first time, and that she did NOT like. :) She started out okay, but then she wasn't too happy - but that could have been because we had been out all day and she was tired from that. :)

Smiles.

This is the closest I've gotten to actually catching a picture while she is smiling. :)

Blue eyes.

Fredrik thinks that Leia's eyes are getting bluer, and in this picture I took today, I guess her eyes do look a little bit brighter blue. :) Not the best picture.. :/ :) I was trying to get a picture of her with a pacifier in her mouth. She doesn't like them and usually spits them out very quickly, and we are trying to get her to take one, thinking that it will help her calm herself. And it will make it a little easier for us to put her to bed. Right now she thinks she wants to eat, but she only wants to suck.. :/ And she wants it to help her to fall asleep - and that is making it difficult for Fredrik to put her to bed. So, this will help out a lot. We've tried the breastmilk on the pacifier, and that has helped a little. We've tried different shapes, and it seems like maybe I might have found one that is working a little better. So, we'll see.. :/ :)

Cocoon Baby.

Leia loves being wrapped in her blanket. :)




We've been writing down the hours that she sleeps, to keep track of how much she actually is sleeping, to make sure that she is sleeping at least a decent amount. Yesterday she slept 11½ hours (only 4½ hours btwn 08.00-20.00)! So, she slept pretty well through the night. So, I had a trying day yesterday trying to get her to sleep some.

Right now she isn't very cooperative when she isn't sleeping or eating. Even when being held she is grumpy and cries. So we are anxiously waiting for her to get a little older where it will be a little easier to entertain her. :)

Fredrik's tooth is hurting him plenty and he is looking forward to his dentist appointment. And he is going to call today and try to get me an appointment to see if I can get some new antibiotics for the "abscess" area.

Besides the new-parent tiredness and "are-we-doing-this-right?!?!," I think we are doing fairly okay. :/ :) It was difficult yesterday, though, with Fredrik gone and having to deal with her not wanting to sleep while being by myself - but it will get me ready for next Monday, when I will be by myself all the time.. :/ :)

But like I said (and like how probably most new parents feel), we are looking forward to her getting at least a little older, so we can have at least a little more structured day, and have an easier time keeping her stimulated.

Fatty.

We had Leia's appointment today, and we set up a time for Fridays for every week after this one.

I was going to take some pictures, but I completely forgot.. :/

But she is getting FAT! :)))

Last Friday, she was 3140 grams, and today she was 3320! (She gained 6.3 oz in 5 days!)
She has a very chubby face. :)
And she went up 1.5 cm in length (now at 51.5 cm).

As soon as we got home, Fredrik got ready to leave. He's only been gone ½ an hour and we miss him already.. :(( :)
The meeting stuff is at his boss's house outside of Mellerud - so not too far away. Not sure how long he'll stay, but they know he isn't interested in being there. :/ :))

A video.

When Leia was 1 week old we took a couple of videos, and this is one of them. The other one she is sleeping and it isn't very exciting. :) The quality is so-so, we took the video with our camera. We've been thinking about getting a digital video camera, that it would be a good "investment." Fredrik said that it is really easy to put them (the videos) together on a DVD from a video camera, and that way we could make lots of videos and send them to Mormor and Morfar in the US. :) So, we'll see if/when we get one! :/ :)

Not again....

Not again... :(

The "abscess" is coming back. :( For the last couple of days now the area that was dorment has gotten a bit harder and bigger and is a little uncomfortable. :/ So, at Leia's appointment tomorrow, we are going to ask what type of medicine I might be able to get while breastfeeding, and see if maybe she can help us get an appointment somewhere so I can talk to a doctor (without having to wait a month). I don't want to give up the breastfeeding.. :/


*Argh....* :(

I guess...

...that I will be posting as often as before.. :P If not more often.. :/ :)



I love this picture. :)


She is holding her own head up.
She is holding her own head up in this one, too.


The sleeping changes are working! :) Already a day later, and she is sleeping so much better.

She is sleeping longer and eating better (longer feeding in one sitting, which in turn makes her sleep longer). And this evening, after her feeding, she wasn't fully asleep, and I laid her in her bed, and I stood there for a few minutes, but she still wasn't asleep, and so I left her room, and she is still asleep (an hour later). So..! We're proud of her. :/ :)) There is no way she would have done that yesterday. And even though it is uncomfy to feed in the chair in her room, I did that instead of taking her down to the couch and sleeping there with her during the early morning hours.

This will make life much easier after Fredrik goes back to work. Not looking forward to him leaving us. :( We will miss his help and his presence, going to miss him being around. :(

On Thursday, we are going to the BVC (Leia's children's clinic) for a check-up, to weigh her and all that stuff. (Btw, her umbilical cord fell off yesterday.) And then we will go once a week after that. Her doctor also mentioned (when they were here last week) about the baby-song group that will start up in January, which we are of course invited to attend.

But also on Thursday, Fredrik has salary meetings with work, from 9 in the morning, until 9 in the evening...! But he will go after our appointment and then come home when he can. There is a larger group meeting and then individual meetings.

And we received the boxes today! (The missing ones from my parents.) :) Some things that I ordered from the States, a couple of cute Halloween things for Leia, and some American candy and yummies for Fredrik and I that you can't buy in Sweden. :)

First walk.

So, here we are on our first walk (today). :) It took Leia a little while to fall asleep, but she is still sleeping now.




And I just talked to someone at the Embassy and we have an appointment for an interview! :) November 14th (Wednesday) at 9am. So, we'll go to Farmor and Farfar's on Tuesday, since Pappa has a dentist appointment on the 12th. :)

1 of 3

So, today we took care of 1 of 3 of our passports. We were able to get my Swedish one taken care of (and the picture ended up scarely awful).. :/

And then after that, Fredrik turned in Leia's paper at the tax office to register her name. We are thinking about waiting a month or so to do her passport, so she is at least a little "older." The passport will last for 5 years...... and it seems so ridiculously stupid to have a picture of a 1-month old for a 5 year old's passport... :/ But that is the way it is.

And then I spent 40 minutes in queue today with the American Embassy to talk to someone about getting her American passport, to get the number to call for an interview in Stockholm. Never got anywhere with that, so I had to hang up so that we could accomplish some other things. Calling hours are only from 1-3.

Today we also went looking for a "new" chair to put in Leia's room. I've been using the rocking chair for breast feeding - and it is very uncomfortable. :/ So, we tried to find a second-hand store to get a chair, but we couldn't find a store, only the Red-Cross store, and they don't have furniture. Then we tried a couple of cheap-junk stores, but they had nothing. Then we tried Mio (expensive furniture store) to see if we couldn't at least find something that I was interested in, so that Fredrik could at least get an idea of what I think would work best. I refuse to pay a lot for something.. :/ But that isn't always so easy to get away with in Sweden.. :/ :)

But while at Mio (I used to love shopping here http://www.mio.se - but then the style just went downhill, and now I prefer SvenskaHem http://www.svenskahem.se), but while there, we found a couch set that we really liked, simple, very durable and reasonably priced.

I tried to find a picture of the couch on their site - but it wasn't there. :P
Our couch is just a little too small for our living room. :/ And we need more room to seat people when we have company.
But who knows when we'll ever get a new one.. :P

Leia is now sleeping in her crib. We've gotten into a very, very bad habit of letting her fall asleep in our arms, and now she cries unless someone is holding her.. :/ Bad judgement on our part from the beginning - but it was next to impossible to not hold her all the time because she is just so gosh-darn adorable.. :/ And I think we were so excited and happy to have her that it was so wonderful to hold her. :/But now for her sake and getting her to sleep better, we are weening her from us, and getting her used to falling asleep in her crib without us around.

After I fed her this evening, though, I laid her on my chest and she raised her head back and looked up at me. :) Very precious. :)

1 week old.

Thank-you, everyone!

A big thank-you to everyone for all the calls, e-mails, flowers and presents! Fredrik took care of all the telephone thank-yous and I'm still working on getting back to people concerning e-mails.

Leia received a beautiful dress outfit from Farmor and Farfar, which is presently in the wash. And she received this adorable dress and orange leggings from Uncle Johan, Aunt Anna, and cousin Kalle:



We absolutely love this; it is something we probably wouldn't have picked out on our own - thinking it too bold, and we love the colors. It is so cute. :)) We hope that it will fit for our trip to the US. We are hoping for a sweater-jacket from Baby Gap from Mormor and Morfar for Christmas that is milk-colored, and will look great with this. :)

And Mormor and Morfar sent 2 boxes of goodies before Leia even showed up, and we haven't received those yet.. :/ So, we are all a bit worried about them. Hopefully they will come on Monday.

We are certain that Leia is making better eye-contact now. :) Now we are looking forward to those purposeful smiles and laughs. :)

I weighed today, and I've already lost 15 pounds (7kg). So, I am back to my pre-pregnancy weight. Although, I weighed in the middle of the day, so it wasn't a very accurate measurement (so it could be even less). Fredrik is making sure that I eat plenty, to keep up with my energy loss and the breastfeeding.

Leia is sleeping, and Fredrik is at the store, picking up the essentials: milk, eggs, flour and baby-wipes. :)

First sponge bath.

Today we decided to give Leia her first sponge bath, her hair was getting a little nasty.. :) She found it extemely "traumatic" and cried the whole time. :)

Today she is 1 week old. :)

During the morning hours she likes to lay and look around at everything - even if she is tired she will fight to stay awake. We are hoping she is trying to settle on a more routine schedule, but it will take a little longer to find out.

We were hoping to have gone on our first walk today, but that didn't happen. :( I've had a bit of a bad headache all day and didn't really feel like going out, so we really hope to do that tomorrow.

But right now she is asleep, and she should stay that way for awhile, until we wake her for her next feeding, so I am going to get some sleep as well. :)

More pictures of Leia.

Click HERE.

House visit.

Today my midwife and Leia's doctor came to visit for a check-up. They were a bit late, and then Fredrik started looking out the windows and he saw a car driving around and around and around and we figured it was them - since no one can ever find our house.. :/ So, he went outside and waved them to our house. :)

They were in-love with her, of course.. :) And we talked about the delivery, how things were at the hospital, how things have been these last few days at home. We asked about some things to make sure they were "normal" ... mostly about her strange sleeping habits, which, of course, aren't abnormal or strange - just her habits for now. :)

They weighed her and they were very pleased with her weight gain. (She's getting a little chubby in the face, actually!)
At birth she was 3150 grams, and two days later when we left the hospital, she was 3040 (which was a great gain-back after only 2 days), and then today it was 3140. So the breast feeding is going very well. I've started pumping, and leaving some milk in the fridge for Fredrik for the mornings, so he can get up and feed Leia in the morning and I can stay in bed a little longer. :)

We also received lots of nice books from them: a book about feeding (solids, etc), a story book with lots of different stories and learning activities, a book about childhood illnesses and at-home treatments, a book about having a child including good advice about lots of things from using the stroller and taking walks to brushing teeth and even talking about sex, and then Leia's health-book, which will chart her weight and height and all her immunizations, etc...

So that will be some nice reading to have.

After that we got Leia dressed and we were going to go to the police station to get her passport, but the police station had closed 2 hours earlier at 15.00! And they aren't open on the weekends (a police station not open on the weekends?!?!?! - welcome to Sweden!!).

So we decided to go get her pictures for the American passport.
We went there a couple of days ago, and he said that the pictures are different than Swedish ones, and so we went back today with the information about measurements.

How strange to take a picture of a 6 day old baby for a passport.. :/ We're a little sceptical about.. the whole baby-having-a-passport thing.. and how long it will last.. So, we'll see.. :/ :) I filled out the forms today for the paperwork, there were strange questions which work for an adult, but not for a child, like.. height, and eye color (which her eye color can change - as well as hair color), and if she has a job, or if she is married.. :/

Oh well.. not our problem. :)

The Delivery.

So, the delivery didn't exactly go down as we thought it would. :/ :)

I had a contraction on Friday morning, around 10.30, before our midwife appointment finally took place, and then every 1-1½ hours I would have another contraction. So, we just waited to see when they would get closer together. They stayed like that until 17.30-18.00 and then they started coming every 1-3 minutes and lasting 20-40 seconds each..! So, a jump from 1 hour to a couple of minutes. This went on until.. 19.00 or so and we called the hospital to see what they would have to say, because it just seemed so strange with the timing. She told use to time everything, the distance between each contraction and how long each contraction lasts, and then to call back in 30-60 minutes. We timed for about 30 minutes and Fredrik called back. She said that it didn't sound like the real thing because the contractions should last longer, about 60 seconds she said. And she suggested some pain pills, a warm bath, and some food.

I took the pills and did the bath. And that relieved some of the back pain that I was having. But after about 15 minutes, everything came back (the back pain was the worst).

I told Fredrik that we need to go, and he called back and made the call that we were coming to the hospital. He said she sounded a little sceptical, because the baby was our first and everything - that we just.. didn't know how things should be.

We make the 70 minute drive to the hospital and luckily there wasn't much traffic. Along the way, though, we passed a cop and 2 ambulances, and when we passed the first one, we were both very much considering stopping and having them take me to the hospital.. but we didn't. :/ We probably should have. :/

The contractions stay the same time interval all the way to the hospital, it is just the intensity of the contractions that change (the pain).

We get to the hospital, and we go up to the 2nd floor, where the maternity stuff is located, and they let me stand in the hallway for.. a good 20 minutes or so (while having contractions), while they are doing God-knows-what.

They finally put me in a bed (at 23.30), to monitor the contractions and the baby's heartbeat. The contractions keep coming the same time, pain of course getting worse. We ring the red button to beg someone for something to help with the pain. She says she'll be back and doesn't come back.. about 15 minutes later we ring the button again and someone else comes in (who ends up being my midwife through the delivery) and we ask her for something for the pain, but while she is in there, another contraction comes, and after that, she says she is going to move me to a delivery room, but first wants to check how far along I am dialated. (I suppose I looked like I was in pain?!) She checked and I was 5 cm dialated and she put my clothes back on me and inbtwn the contractions she helped me wobble to the room while Fredrik ran to get some of our bags from the car.

We get to the room and by this time, the contractions are almost scream-worthy. She checks me again, and I was still 5 cm. Might be around 00.00 by this time. They reconnect me to the monitors and she shows me how to use the laughing gas (lustgas). The next contraction comes and I take a few puffs of the air, the gas comes after a few breaths and it made me completely nauseous. I couldn't use it. I tried it again and it made me nauseous (Fredrik was my vomit-bag holder but luckily I never needed it). :)))

So, I couldn't use that to help with the pain. She (the midwife, Veronica) decides to go ahead and have the anesthesiologist come and give me my requested walking-epidural (stå epidural) for the labor. She starts to put the IV in my arm, and it just wouldn't go in - which is very unusual - I've never had that problem before. (So, now my inner elbow is bruised purple and yellow, from all the poking.) So, she tries to put it in my hand. She gets it in, but it hurt A LOT. I asked if it was a plastic IV needle - and it was. I'm allergic to plastic. So, she takes it out. The anesthesiologist and the midwife talk, and he decides that he refuses to put the tube in my back for the epidural, because it is also plastic, and he doesn't want to create a bad reaction. So, I can't get that epidural.

They talk a few minutes and the midwife says that they will check to see how far along I have gotten, and give me a full epidural. She takes a peek, and I am 10 cm dilated. So, too late to get an epidural. She has another anesthesiologist come to see what might be able to be done. (I was screaming bloody-murder, I think I would have won any horror movie audition.) Not sure on the time at this point, it was maybe 01-01.30 or something.

The anesthesiologist decides the only thing she can do is give me a shot in the cervix. But she tells me she is 100% certain that it won't do anything. She gives me 10mg of something-or-other and she said she could only inject on the upper part of the cervix, the other part wasn't visible. But she was right, it did absolutely nothing for the pain, and it probably would have been better if she wouldn't have tried, because I had to go through contractions while she was trying to give me the shot (and I was supposed to hold as still as possible......).

After this, they let me lay back on my side, because it was most "comfortable." The nurse rubbed my lower back during the contractions and amazingly that helped the back pain tremendously. I felt so bad about my screaming, about anyone in any of the rooms near us..

Hmmmm...
Soon the delivery began. A contraction would start and at the end of it, my body would push on its own, it was really something I couldn't control. A very strange experience if I do say so myself. Very, very painful. :/ :))

They moved me into the stirrups. And I was allowed to begin pushing.
With each contraction and pushing (2-3 good pushes per contraction) I thought that was the most pain I have ever or could ever experience in my life - until the next one began. :/ :) The pushing really only hurt from my shoulders up, but then the burning in my nether-regions was.. a bit unbearable.

I could feel all the blood rushing to my head with the pushing.. :/
And after everything, when I went to shower and looked in the mirror ... I popped probably every blood vessel from my shoulders up.. :/ So I was covered in red dots everywhere, and I looked like I had a horrible disease.. :/ So, I ended up being very self-concious for the rest of the stay in the hospital until they started going away.. :/ Because no one else had red dots everywhere.. :/

I only had 3 stitches, they were expecting more I think (deeper ones), but I got away with only surface tears. The midwife worked on the stitches and Leia laid on my chest, and Fredrik then left to go call Mormor/Morfar and Farmor/Farfar. (It was a little too early in the morning to ring anyone else.)

Fredrik came back and the midwife and nurse left and gave the 3 of us some private time together. :) And then they brought our "fika." A very needed snack after our loss of energy. Then the midwife came back and weighed and measured Leia. I was able to shower and Fredrik took a short nap.

While waiting for our transfer to the maternity ward, the midwife sat with us and talked about how quickly everything went and she was curious how everything started. Fredrik thinks that they probably feel a little bad for not taking us seriously over the telephone. :/

Fredrik was great through the delivery. He made sure I kept drinking plenty. He didn't scream with me, but I do think he pushed with me, though. :) Strange to think how something so simple as holding someone's hand can give so much comfort and help during something so incredibly painful. :)

I've had many requests for how things went during delivery, so - there it is.. :) We were at the hospital for what.. 3½ hours before Leia arrived (from 5 cm to having a baby in my arms). I've been writing this a little at a time for several days now.. :/ :) Next I will write about our stay in the maternity ward. Many are intersted in any differences btwn here and the States, so I'll work on that and post it when I'm finished.

The midwife had said to me that I should be proud for going through all that so quickly and all the pain and everything. I only hope that Fredrik is proud of me. That is what is most important.

Diaper changing with Pappa.

Slightly challenging day.

Leia has been fighting us today.. :/ :)

She just would not go to sleep, only wanting to eat. I don't know how that little being can eat so much.. :/ :) But Fredrik kept her pretty well contented so I could shower and have some breakfast. And after some more food and some crying, I laid her on my chest and she fell asleep and I fell asleep, too, and Fredrik took a picture:



Not a bad picture. :) (Besides my hair being very wet and all over the place.) :))

Fredrik called the Tax Office today and got her government number, we hadn't received it in the mail yet (they said it should probably show up tomorrow), but they gave him the numbers over the telephone.

So hopefully we can try tomorrow to go and get some things done, passport, etc...

Tomorrow, my midwife and Leia's pediatrician (barnläkare) will come to the house for a check-up. My midwife called today to let us know and asked some questions about how the delivery went.

While Leia and I were napping, Fredrik tried to straighten up the house a little and he took lots of paper to recycle. And 2 women came in a tiny, little car that was barely able to get up the hill to our house and took some of our moving boxes.

Leia did really well during the night, though, last night.
She fought a little to sleep during her last feeding before we go to bed, but after that, she did well during the night, I only had to get up 2 times. And then when I got up for the early morning feeding for the start of the day, she has been cranky since then. We are guessing she has an upset tummy and/or gas. :/

Her smiles are adorable. :) Hope to try to catch a picture of one, soon.

It's my birthday...??!

Today is my 28th birthday! Happy Birthday to me!

We had actually forgotten.. :/ How horrible is that?!
Getting a birthday card from my parents yesterday reminded us. Time is very pushed together right now and I think today creeped up on us.

Not really doing anything to celebrate.. we don't really have the energy. :)

We got up early today and got ready to go to the midwife (we had to go to a different one than my normal midwife because she is on vacation). We had to do some blood tests for Leia since we left the hospital after 2 days. And the tests have to be done after 3 days, so they fixed an appointment for us here in town so that we wouldn't have to drive back to Trollhättan to just do that test.

We also went to go get some pictures for Leia's American passport, but they have to be a different size than the normal Swedish sized pictures, and of course he didn't know it, so we will just go back tomorrow with the measurements and he can take some pictures. :)

After that we went (across the street) to the store with some baby clothes, to try to find some more things that "fit" her now. Her diapers keep sliding down her butt, we call her the "gangster baby" because every time we take her clothes off her diaper is half way off her butt. :)) So, with the onesies that are a size 50, they are a perfect fit for right now, and hold her diapers in place. So we grabbed a couple of cheap clothes to keep her poop from getting everywhere because of diaper slippage. :)

She does really well in the car. She stays asleep or it puts her to sleep if she isn't already. Everyone wants to take peeks at her in the stores and everyone thinks she is adorable. :)

I had to get up 4 times last night, and Fredrik got up 2 of those times with me - doesn't hurt having diaper changing help at 3 in the morning. :)

It felt strange to put on normal clothes today when going out. But nice to be able to fit into my pre-pregnancy clothes. :))

We just got home a little while ago and had some lunch. Leia is still sleeping, so I am going to try to go sleep until the next feeding time.

And I think that I might have to try to make some yummy cookies to celebrate my birthday!

First pictures of Leia!

Click HERE to see the first pictures of our little Princess.

Busy morning.

So, I won't be blogging as much as I used to, obviously, :) but I hope to keep up with it because I know how important it is to all those family members and friends that live very far away.

Last night was the best night so far. :)
She slept very well in her crib, even though she is so tiny and the crib is so big. :)
At the hospital (aha, now one of the midwives from the hospital is calling - to see how everything is going at home and if there is anything we are worrying or wondering about), at the hospital, she didn't feed or sleep so well at night, but last night she did very well with eating, and then she would sleep much better.

And it was sooo nice having Pappa with us last night. :) I haven't had a full nights sleep since Wednesday night, and I've only had at most 3 hours a day since then.. :/ So, I've been pretty tired. It was really difficult for me to sleep at the hospital, and the last night (second night there), I had a really inconsiderate roommate that had shown up that day, and.. she was very noisy and rude, so neither the baby or I could get any sleep, and so I ended up going out on one of the couches and sleeping a few minutes inbtwn unhappy-babyness. :)

But last night, Pappa would get up if there was some unhappiness, and check her diaper or try to comfort her - and that let me stay in our soft bed and sleeeeep. So, I didn't have to get up so often last night, maybe 3 times or so, and Pappa got up 2 times I think. So, we are making progress with her sleeping

Pappa is now on the phone with a workmate. :) He's been on the phone with him on and off all day so far. :/ He is taking over some for Pappa during these next 2 weeks while he doesn't have to work (he gets 10 work days to stay home, and then he can fix his paterniy-leave time and decide how much to stay at home, etc...
So, the workmate needs lots of help to understand what is going on with the project (which is something that most construction workers/bosses don't understand - that someone new just can't come in and take over, that it is much more complicated than that).

And this morning, a container of pellets showed up. :( So, Pappa had to carry all of those to the basement, and now he is really, really tired. (I think we will all be needing plenty of naps today.) I wanted to help, but Leia was feeding at the time. :/ And when she was done, I got properly dressed and went out to help, and there was one bag left to carry..... So, I didn't get to help him at all... :/

But today we do hope to try to get some pictures taken for Leia's American passport, try to register her government number and see if we can get to the police station and get her Swedish passport. Maybe my passport, too! So, we'll see what we manage to get done. We don't want to push Leia too much with what we can do, so we'll see how she does while we are out today and take it a step at a time and if she gets too cranky we can easily come home and try again another day. :)

I'll share more pictures later! :)

Welcome Home, Leia!!

Here is a picture of our "bundle of joy" before we left the hospital. :)



She's in her adorable little outfit that Pappa bought for her yesterday. :) Her first pink, girl-clothes. :)) An adorable Hello Kitty fleece outfit. And the right size, too. She is so small that all of her clothes are pretty big. So he bought a very small outfit (storlek 50) - not sure what that would be in the States. But it fits perfect. So, she will be able to wear all her clothes for awhile. :)

And a thanks to Pappa for updating the blog while Mamma and Leia were still at the hospital. So, we got home today, about 2 hours ago, and we've been letting Caesar sniff and look, although right now he isn't that interested! And we've just been staring at her and we're completely in awe. :)

Her name is:
Leia Margareta Stephanie

It might not all go well together (sound so good, especially in Swedish), but we like it. :) We had thought about adding an Emma in there! Just incase she grows up and doesn't like Leia, so she could have another name to choose that is more common, but then we decided "Who wouldn't be honored to be named after Princess Leia?!?" :)

But we'll have more updates later - about our hospital experience and plenty more pictures, too!

Leia

Our new little family member.

It´s a ...

GIRL! :)

Showed up at 2:37 last night, and has lots of brown hair and blue eyes.

Weighed 3,15kg (6944,6 pounds) and was 50 cm (19,69 inches) long.

We haven´t quite decided on the name yet, Freja(which was what we were leaning towards) just doesn´t seem right now after seeing her.

Everyone is doing ok but we´re all quite tired.

We´re hoping to all be home on Sunday, but we´ll see what happens.

Off to the hospital.

We are going to the hospital.

The pain is pretty intense, but extremely irregular. Called the hospital and they gave some suggestions for helping with the irregularity, but it didn't help. :/ So they said we can of course come to the hospital.

So, next time we come home, it might be with a baby, it might not. :/ :))

To 'dop,' or not to 'dop...'

[Dop = Christenings.. Infant baptisms..]

Right after Fredrik and I met (almost 9 years ago!), we had decided right away and very easily that we didn't want to have a Swedish "dop."

But Karl-Astrid's youngest cousin, Kalle, recently had his 'dop' and with having a child of our own, it brings up the question again on if we want to have one or not.

There are reasons for having one and reasons for not having one.. :/ :)

Religiously:

1. I don't believe in infant baptisms religiously.

2. Fredrik is an atheist, so he doesn't believe in anything. :D

Tradition:

- Swedish tradition to have a 'dop' - not for religious reasons, but culturally. It is seen as a name-giving ceremony. And now-a-days people are leaving the church and doing them other places, like outside or in their homes. (A priest still performs the name-giving ceremony.)

- Name the Godparents. (But we don't have any Godparents.. :/)

Difficult, though, because no family really lives very close by. :/ If we were in Nyköping, I think it would have been a little easier to have one, with Farmor and Farfar nearby, and plenty of Fredrik's cousins nearby, etc.. And plenty of friends, schoolmates and workmates probably would want to come. But here, there is no family and we've not had time to make any friends!

Fredrik really doesn't want one - he doesn't really care, I think he would prefer to not have one. :) I don't really care either, but only that it would be nice to have that tradition for the child.. We probably won't have a "dop" ... :/ If we had still been living in Nyköping, I think we might would have, though.


Speaking about Karl-Astrid's cousins, they really vary in age. :/

At his/her birth, the age range is going to be from the oldest, Amanda at 22 years, and the youngest, Kalle at 6 months! He/She will have 7 cousins in total: 22, 21, 20, 9, 5, 5, 6months. :)


The contractions are getting much more intense, more painful and lasting longer. I think that there is still the same distance between them, but I don't think it will be very long before we make our trip to the hospital.

5%

5% of babies actually show up on their due date..

I think the contractions are coming more frequently, but I'm not sure.. :/
I have such a high tolerance of pain, that.. I'm afraid it is going to sneak-up on me and all of a sudden - I'll be in great pain and we'll be rushing to get to the hospital.. :/

I'm so nervous that they are getting closer together that I have been munching on so much candy.. :D I've probably gained 50 pounds in the last week.. :D (maybe not 50..).

She said that if I am having trouble knowing if the feelings or discomfort is a real contraction, that we can try to base when the contractions show up by how much my stomach tightens and by how hard it gets.

My tummy is extremely hard right now.. :/
So.. maybe they are getting closer together.. :/
In my "pregnancy bible" from the US, "What to Expect When You're Expecting" it says to count from the beginning of one contraction to the beginning of the next, to find out how far apart the contractions are coming. And right now, it is about every 1-1½ hours I get the tightening and pelvic discomfort.

I'll keep everyone posted.. :/ :))

A bit rushed.

Our appointment was at 10 - we didn't get to see her until 10.35, and it was to the point where Fredrik and I had made the decision to leave. :/ His work called him this morning and they really needed him, so we were stressed for time anyways.

The pregnant couple before us went over 25 minutes in time, and then some woman showed up that had an appointment after us (too old to be pregnant - NO idea what she was doing there), but she pushed her way in front of us, the midwife was annoyed and so were we.

Right when we were going to leave, she took us in and we just got home a couple of seconds ago and Fredrik hurried and changed clothes and left for work. Even though it isn't, I feel like it is my fault and I hate that he is getting to work so late. :/

And no passport.. :/ We went to a place to get passport pictures (before our midwife appointment) and he said that all pictures have to be taken at the police station now (because of the new, special requirements for passports). And we couldn't go to the police station to get the passport because he had to go back to work so quickly. So, we will have to do it another day. :/

The appointment went so fast - I barely remember any numbers. :/ :)

I think my iron was 126. Don't remember my blood pressure or my glucose, but she said they were good. Baby's heartbeat was from 135-145, but stayed on the upper side mostly, 140-148. She commented that it was a good fluctuation.

I'm definitely having contractions, but irregular ones. So she said when they start getting closer together, to make sure we go to the hospital.

I'm definitely going to try to have to sleep today.. :/
I didn't start dozing off until about 05.30 and then I slept off and on until my alarm went off this morning - so, I didn't sleep much at all last night.. :/ I'm not really tired, but I know I need to try to sleep.

I made 2 loaves of banana bread yesterday, and a batch of brownies. I hope to make 4 quiche today, that is the plan, but we'll see if I have the energy. :)

No idea when Fredrik will get home today. :/ He might stay longer because of being so late. And he needs to go to Mellerud, to where the office stores their winter tires, and have the winter tires put on his work car. It is a garage, and we are thinking about storing our winter tires there, too.

I usually have contraction pain in the evening, every day, but today I had it this morning. So, maybe they are getting closer together! We'll have to wait and see.

Ohh..! And a congrats to Al Gore for getting the Nobel Peace Prize!!

Can't sleep.

Ugh.. :/ Can't sleep.. :/

Woke up around 02.30 and couldn't fall back asleep and I finally made my way downstairs around 03.30 to get something to eat.

Nerves, maybe? :/
I vacuumed the house at 20.30 last night. :/ :) A bit restless. :/

Caesar is sleeping in the couch, so maybe I will join him and see if I can have some luck with sleeping a bit more.

Impatient.

I think we have gotten a little impatient waiting for this child to show up. :)) We did not think that we would be going to our midwife appointment tomorrow. It feels so weird having all this baby stuff everywhere, the stroller is patiently waiting in our kitchen.. And to not have a baby. :/ :) It feels a little weird.

Fredrik's workmates ask him every day if the baby has shown up - which is nice for them asking, but a little redundant, because he wouldn't be at work if the baby had shown up!! :)

Tomorrow, 10 o'clock, we have our midwife appointment. Before the appointment we were going to go to the office where we learn how to take care of our parent-leave money, but Fredrik talked to his boss (who is presently on ½ leave for parent-time) and he explained everything - so that is nice. Because the office in town is only open about 3 hours a week, and it is next to impossible to catch it when it is open. But tomorrow after the midwife appointment we are finally going to go apply for my Swedish passport! I have to have one. It is a universal law that if you are a citizen of a country, you HAVE to enter that country with that country's passport. It is illegal otherwise, and you can be refused entry at immigration. But getting this done will be another item to cross off of our to-do list. :)

I put all the papers together for the baby, to: register the birth with the US, apply for a Social Security Number (same as a Swedish personnummer), and apply for a US passport, and have them packed to take to the hospital. I figured that would be the best time we have to fill out all the papers. :/ :)

Rain, rain, rain. And cold. :/ Soon this rain will turn to snow. I hope we get a few walks in before the snow comes!

Fredrik is doing well. Maybe more anxious than I am. :)) Caesar is getting heavier, still building up his winter fat and fur.

But Fredrik called the hospital to reserve one of the car seats from them. And they said it wasn't necessary to reserve one, that they had plenty so we can just get one when we get there. You can rent them for 9 months, with a fee and a deposit, 500:- total (70$). Our midwife says that most everyone rents them (because of how expensive car seats are).

Nervous for the car ride to the hospital! :))
There are traffic speeding cameras the entire road to the hospital (how stupid is that?!?!?!). Who puts speeding cameras on the main road to a hospital?!
We asked the midwife if there is any way to get any tickets voided out after the baby shows up (so we can speed and get tickets, but not have to pay! - so we can get to the hospital faster), but she said that isn't possible to do. :/ She said that we just have to learn where the cameras are and slow down before coming to them! :))

But now I need to go check on the laundry! :)

EDD, gender, DIF clothes, and names.

So, we're almost 2 days away from our EDD (estimated due date). :)

The actual EDD should have been October 6th. But the GYN pushed it back a week to October 13th (because of my PCO problem). And then the ultrasound technician said the EDD should be October 16th. But we decided that pushing it back one week was enough, and left it at Oct. 13th. :)

There has been plenty of cramping and pain tonight. It is much more prevalent in the evening. Fredrik's guess is for tomorrow, so we'll see. :)

We are still hoping for a girl, I think. :) I think mostly because there are so few girls in Fredrik's family. Boys tend to run on his side of the family, while girls run on my side of the family. So, we'll see what we end up with. :)

Tonight we made a trip to the grocery store and finally picked up some plants for the baby's room and a new light bulb for the lamp in the window. And since it is dark outside earlier, and with the light, it is a very cozy room. :) A perfect, soft light.

Some of Sweden should be getting snow tonight! My first year in Sweden, I woke up to about 2 feet of snow on my birthday!! I couldn't believe it. :/ :)

I found some adorable clothes today.. a DIF outfit of course. :) (DIF is a Stockholm club, Fredrik's favorites for icehockey and soccer.) So, I think we are going to have to order these. :)





And then after Baby shows up, we will order either the pink or the blue set. :)







On the way home from Karlstad last Saturday, we were talking about how I wish we could use the name "Stephanie" for a girl. (For those that don't know, I have a sister that died right after she was born, her name is Stephanie Michelle, and she would have been 40 years old this year.) But Stephanie just doesn't work in Swedish, so Fredrik suggested we use it as a third name. :) So, if we have a girl, no matter what, her third name will be Stephanie. :) I was very happy for his suggestion, so that we still get to use the name (if Baby ends up being a girl).

I think that tomorrow I will decorate for Halloween. :)

Our Miracle Baby.

People keep asking us if we plan on having more children after this one. And our response is, of course, that we don't know. That has to do with the fact that we honestly don't know. We might think that one is enough for us and our family, but it also has a little to do with my medical condition. Which is why our little Precious One is sorta our little miracle baby.

I have an illness called PCO or PCOS (poly cystic ovaries / poly cystic ovarian syndrome).

A brief explanation:
It is an illness where hundreds of small, tiny cysts grow on the ovaries. They release hormones and affect hormones within the body, so that it doesn't exactly function how it should.

One major symptom is: Infertility.

Not many people can say that they are truly overweight because of a medical illness.. but I can.
The PCOS causes my body to not be able to break down glucose and fat the way that it is supposed to, and my body stores it when it should burn it.

There is no cure, and no direct medication for PCOS. Many women take different kinds of hormonal medicines to try to lessen the different symptoms that one can have. Some women have all symptoms, some have only a few. But being overweight is the common symptom that everyone has.

The weight issue is such a problem with PCOS, that many women with it CANNOT lose weight on their own, and most that go down in weight, do so by having gastric bypass surgery. (Which I have thought about seriously 2 times in the past.) So, for me to have lost 100 pounds (45 kg) in one year - on my own - is nothing short of a miracle on its own.

My first symptoms showed up when I was 17-18, but the illness was pretty much unknown at that time.
I was diagnosed when I was 20-21, and at this time, the illness was still extremely new.
My doctor put me on 2000 mg of Glucophage per day. And the medicine made me incredibly sick. It is a fertility drug that the doctor thought would help the hormonal problems. It didn't help, of course, and it made me so sick, that it caused me to stay inside all the time, and in turn, gain more weight from my inactiveness (what happened to me after I moved to Sweden).

I stopped taking the pills and suffered a horrible change in my menstrual cycle. When we moved to Nyköping, my GYN put me on an incredible pill that fixed my cycle (which drastically changed my life quality). I decided to forgo any kind of medication to help my PCOS.

About the weight issue:
I tried, twice, to go to a bariatric clinic in Stockholm, but was twice refused.

The first time, the doctor sent the application, and it was denied.
The second time, I went to a different doctor, and he sent an application along with lots of blood tests. This time I was also denied.

My problem is that I am/was too healthy, so they wouldn't help me. It was a clinic where you go and spend 2 weeks there and they go over many things with you and do many tests and decide the best way for each individual to lose weight, whether it be a change in diet, surgery, or medication. But they wouldn't even see me. All my tests were too good. Especially considering that I don't have diabetes, which is almost always a definite symptom of PCOS. So, that was really depressing for me, because I really wanted help. (That was when we were in Stockholm.)

We moved to Nyköping and I started losing weight on my own. With a lot of determination. I really never changed the way I ate - as that was not the problem. My problem was that I became immobile after moving to Sweden. People would look, people would stare, when I would go outside - and that made it worse. Then I only wanted to sit inside and then I would just gain more weight from not doing anything. And I finally told myself to not care what people think, and I spent all day on our exercise bike, and took a long walk every evening. It took several months for anything to happen (probably my body fighting the whole thing). And then I started going to school again and that helped me a lot with confidence because I made so many friends. And it made me want to go outside and go to school - so it was then very easy to continue losing weight.

After a year of losing weight, I was up for my annual GYN appointment, but I was already pregnant. Something I was certain could never happen. We had talked about adopting. I was getting ready to talk to my GYN about fertility treatment. If I had to go on a time-waiting list, or if I would be able to skip that process because of my medical condition.

My GYN knew from the previous appointment that I was trying to lose weight and when he saw me he was ecstatically happy. And even happier when we saw the ultrasound for the first time. (Maybe even happier than we were?!?) :)

I think that is why I was so heart broken that first midwife appointment in Nyköping when the midwife complained about my weight. After all the work of losing weight, and still being overweight, and having an illness that causes infertility - you would think she would be happy for us that we are pregnant and not complain about me losing more weight. I think that is why I was so sad - I was expecting her to be as happy as my GYN.

But luckily we have had an incredible midwife here in Åmål. Wouldn't trade her for anything.

So, even with me still being overweight and thinking I would never get pregnant on my own - we are having our little miracle baby. :) So, we might not be able to get pregnant again, because of the PCOS (even if I lose more weight - the PCOS is here to stay and will always cause problems).

So, if we ever decide we DO want more children, but medically can't, we will definitely adopt. But right now, I think we are going to be very content with our Karl-Astrid. :) Of course Fredrik, being the optimist that he is, didn't think it would be impossible for us to have children.. :) But I can definitely say that we are probably the two happiest people on Earth. :)

We've had the opportunity of experiencing every part of a relationship together. :)
Being engaged, and then the time of being married with just the two of us, and now with being pregnant these last 9 months, and now we get to enter a new and different part: having a baby. :/ :)))

Long lost twin??

So, Fredrik was at work in Bengtsfors yesterday and he called me during the middle of the day. He asked me if I was at home (which obviously I was since I answered the phone). And he said that he had just seen me walking in Bengtsfors.. :/ :) My exact copy. He so much thought it was me that he had to call and check and make sure I was still at home. :D

But while on the phone, he admitted that he is having a horrible time concentrating at work. :/ I think he is a bit anxious for our new family member. :) I told him that the longer it takes for the Baby to show up, the even harder it will get for him to stay focused while gone all day.

But no babies.. :) Not today at least.

I've been having some pretty good pelvic pain though since Fredrik got home from work. The baby is settled extremely low and pushing down quite a lot. Fredrik keeps hugging my tummy - trying to push the Baby out I think. :))

I set up the intercom system. It is pretty nice. It will be nice to have. Especially if I am doing laundry in the basement and Baby is upstairs and starts to scream in its crib. It will be nice to have to carry around.

Lots of frost outside this morning.. :/ White everywhere. :/ :)

Ooh..! And I found 2 jackets! Jackets that will be perfect for fall. Although a bit too big, 3 months, they will work well just the same. I got them from when I worked at the child-clothing store (I found them in a box after Caesar jumped up onto a pile of a couple of boxes still left unpacked upstairs). One is pink and fleece (Old Navy) and the other is.. either GAP or Old Navy (don't remember) and it is maroon and wool. So, if it is a girl, she can wear both, or a boy can wear the maroon one. So, we have our bases covered until it gets a bit colder. :) There were other clothes, too, which are very gender specific, so those can't be unpacked until we know if it is a boy or a girl. :)

Caesar is clingy and whiny.. :/ Extremely curious about the Baby's room. He keeps hiding under the crib and wanting to get into the drawers of the changing table.

I am in love with our stroller. :/ :) The colors are beautiful and it is going to be such a joy to use when trying to lose weight again after Baby shows up.

And I received my new laptop yesterday! Fredrik got home and said that they are on their way with it. So, now I have a fully functioning keyboard and I can finally transfer all my stuff onto it and Fredrik can reinstall the desktop.

Movies to watch:
- Disturbia
- Simpsons
- Fantastic Four 2

Movies to avoid:
- Halloween (new Rob Zombie remake)
- SpiderMan 3

We saw Disturbia and it was really good. Reminded me of a.. new version of The Burbs. :)

Now it is dinner time. :P Fredrik is hungry.

40th Week of Pregnancy

What changes are occurring with your body?
During pushing and delivery, your baby's head will begin to make an appearance through your vaginal opening with each contraction. When your baby's head remains visible and does not slip back in, it is known as crowning.

As your baby's head crowns, you will experience a burning or stinging sensation, often referred to as “the ring of fire,” as your baby stretches the vaginal opening. As soon as you feel this, stop pushing! If you continue to push and bear down, you increase your risk of tearing or needing an episiotomy.

The burning or stinging sensation only lasts for a short time and is followed by a numb feeling. This is due to your baby's head stretching your vaginal tissue so thin that the nerves are blocked. The result is a natural anesthetic.

How big is your baby?
Your baby should be between 19 and 21 inches (48-53 cm) long and weigh anywhere from 6 ¾ to 10 pounds (3-4,5 kg). If you are having a boy, then he is most likely on the larger side of these ranges, because on average boys are bigger than girls.

What is happening with your baby?
Your baby’s bones have become hard, with the exception of his/her skull. The bones in the skull need to remain soft and pliable for delivery so that they can overlap as they pass through the birth canal. Because a newborn’s skull is designed this way, your baby’s head may have a cone appearance for the first several days of life. Your baby will actually have two soft spots, or fontanelles, on their head which allow for an easier delivery. The front fontanelle will become hard between the eighth and fifteenth month of life. The back fontanelle becomes hard between the third and fourth month.

T-5 days!

No babies yet. :)
Getting closer and closer to our estimated due date.

Anyone else hate showering as much as I do??!
I shower every morning - I just feel nasty if I don't. But I try to wash my hair every other day - depending on what we are doing, etc.. And it takes ½ as long to shower if I don't wash my hair (I have a lot of hair).

Showering is just.. the same thing over and over and over.. no excitement .. no surprises .. the same routine over and over.. :/ And I'm going to have to do it every day for the rest of my life.. :/ (or at least almost every day).

Hmmm...

No babies.. :) Maybe tomorrow.

Karl-Astrids sovrum.

So, here is a present view of Karl-Astrid's bedroom. :) Not finished (a few things missing), but we like it. :) [You can click on each picture for a larger view.]



Missing a curtain. :) I made the blanket on the chair!

I decided that since Karl-Astrid is going to be a World traveler before the age of 2 months, that he/she needs a map in the room. :)


We want to replace the door, but that is a later problem.






Now we just have to build the balcony off this room. :D

I think that Karl-Astrid will like the room. :) It is cozy.